It smells like sweat. I see the weights. I can almost feel the burn they create and the iron in my hands. I imagine adding the smell of my sweat to the room.  I can’t remember why I used to fight this besides the comforts of being lazy, but some days I enjoy the struggle. These are the thoughts I have before my work outs. With my limits now, my thoughts turn to how much can I push it. Some days I feel so normal that I forget I can’t run as hard and I must ignore the call of wanting my muscles to burn. There’s satisfaction in that.

What I never forget is how blessed and lucky I am to be alive. I was able to get in a solid 23 minutes of exercise tonight. That’s a lot for me. April 27th I have another CT scan to see how much I’m healing. All I can do is continue to be patient.

I don’t seem to be patient with house hunting. It drags on and I’m the type of person who knows what they want. I don’t expect brand new or remodeled.  I’m only renting, but it seems like space is non existent. I just want space…beautiful breathing room. A yard. Maybe a walk in closet?  And a big enough kitchen to where I don’t have to limit my cooking utensils.  That’s it. Simple, yet not so simple. Ugh!

On a positive note, I’m going to find a horse to brush this weekend. That’s pure happiness for my soul. 

Advertisements